Notes on My First Baby...Technically!

When I was 13, I learned a love that most people don’t experience until they are adults. This day, 20 years ago, I became an aunt for the first time.

I couldn’t fully understand the kind of love I had for this new baby, but it felt big and would continue to feel big…It was a bigger than most love that I had known. I loved my parents and my siblings, of course, but at 13 and the youngest of four, that kind of love was given—it had always been. I never knew life without it.  

But Aunt-Love that was new. Simple, pure, easy and natural. She wasn’t my kid, but she was a piece of me. My sister, who I loved so very much had this new piece to her. A baby. I could play with her, teach her cute things, marvel at everything she did and give her back for the hard parts.

Most aunts can’t fully enjoy their nieces and nephews since, in many cases, they are busy parenting their own children.  Based on the age gap between her mom and me (10 years younger than Ashley and 13 older than Karleigh), I was able to play a cool intermediary role between mom and daughter. You know the “cool” pal who can give advice to either party without overstepping or intruding, or the one who was told what outfit to buy for the kid because it would be accepted as an awesome gift from said cool intermediary. (sorry Karleigh).

And because I was single and didn’t have my own kids yet, I fell in love with my role as aunt.

There have been so many joys over the past 20 years, watching the adorable newborn transition from a feisty, strong-willed kid to a confident, self-assured teenager and now to a beautiful, thoughtful adult. But of all of the joys my favorite part has been the view, front and center, watching two of my favorite people grow into the best-friends moms and daughters are supposed to be.

And while days of parenting are never over, it seems fitting that as the teen years wrap up for you, Karleigh, I can let you in on this little secret I have had, and part of why I have loved being her aunt so very much. As you have grown and matured, I could see what an genuine, loyal best friend your mom would be for you and I knew what a cool, creative, caring best friend Ashley would have in you. There is nothing more special than watching that happen and I am so thankful for the view right in between you!